Reverend Reverend please come quick 'cause I got something to admit

[unpocoloco]

Who: Ernesto OR Héctor + TWO Mingle spaces
What: TOUR AND A MOVIE PART TWO; STARING YOU? + NECROMANCY; HONEST EFFORTS (a.k.a, Héctor's failed revival this month is a truth spell.)
When: April, late in the month
Where: A filming location in Soliel, Daybreak Academy
Warning: N/A
Notes: People affected by Héctor's accidental truth spell can also bring this into the movie mingle. Have you ever lied without actually lying? Now's the time to learn!

TOUR AND A MOVIE

Filming is ramping up.

Just as before, Higher Daybreak faculty are encouraging participants to see this as a way of learning to use their magical skills in a way that is discrete and ensures the protection of the Veil. It's spoken of as a chance for students to better learn how to hide their abilities while still putting them to use, disguising them as various other talents. In turn, they'll be credited in the film's production once it's complete, as well as receive extra credits in related courses. And of course, besides the great publicity, what better way to make a hit movie than adding a magical touch to it?

While work around the set continues to be welcomed and encouraged, this month filmmakers are particularly keen on finding those who can fill a newly opened role for an extra! Daybreak students are being to the very rare and special opportunity to audition in, without even going through the gruelling ordeal of terse agents, discouraging phone calls, and dull waiting areas! Just line right up and give it your best!

The following roles are open:

-Kindly and Adoring Town's Person Number Five

-Irritable Officer Number Two

-Overdramatic Restaurant Employee (or Customer, adjusted to match ages)

On top of this extraordinary opportunity, the winning student will be treated to a day on the town with De La Cruz himself.

On top of all this, with the improving weather, more scenes are being shot outside and in the heart of Soliel. It's quite possible to wander on set entirely by accident! Just remember that maintaining the laws of the Veil during this important project is still of utmost importance.



~~~~~~



HONEST EFFORTS

Nothing happened. He took precautions, he followed the spell, he did everything right. He double-checked the runes and then triple checked the cage he'd set himself up in. There was light, there was energy, a whole burst of it shooting up around him and then darting out past the walls (and over the campus). And then nothing. He was still just as dead as before. He wasn't even a different kind of dead like his usual screw-ups led to. He made a flashy light show and nothing more. In a fit of frustration, he scraped the whole circle, packed up, and settled in to go back to work the next night.

But, with that morning, students and faculty alike around Daybreak may find themselves afflicted with a sudden need to be a little more candid than usual. Maybe a lot more candid.

The urge for honesty may manifest in being suddenly unable to lie-- either directly or at all. It might mean talking way too much. Maybe it means confessing things you've been bottling up, or simply showing who you are inside when you'd normally be inclined to hide it. It might just be something small and simple going throughout the day. Or, it could build into something so overwhelming it becomes impossible to bear until the truth is out. It varies from person to person and does, eventually, go away.

But it also may be intensified in those who might be just a bit too close to a certain someone...

Comments

[unpocoloco]

"Okay," He says softly. "Gracias." He doesn't know if he will. There's a lot on his mind and he kind of just wants to untangle it while the urge to blurt it out has calmed momentarily.

[hawkwardness]

The quiet lasts for a good few minutes--give the bird-boy credit for that much. The desperate urge inside him builds until he wants to scream, talk about anything. What's a safe topic he can latch onto?

Oh.

< You know what would be nice? If we could fly together. I think you'd like it, flying as a bird. I know, I know, it's stupid. Doesn't stop me fantasizing about flying around with some of you. Almost every day. > A beat. < God, you were robbed too. >

[unpocoloco]

"Mmm," He hums. "I'm not the greatest with flight. Dios knows I've tried. Imelda would have flown with you. Miss her..."

He hadn't meant to add that last part but this is the situation he's in. As for that part on Tobias' end.

"Death doesn't care about age much. Unfortunately."

[hawkwardness]

< It could be better with your own wings. > He buries his beak in his feathers, but it doesn't help... < I liked her. Can't exactly say she's my favorite person in the world now. >

Safe to assume she's lost his trust, judging by how bitter he sounds. Again. Shame hits him a moment later and he draws in on himself, feeling like his veins have turned to ice. < Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I--I have to go. You don't need this from me. >

[unpocoloco]

He makes a face, bobbing his head side to side as though to say maybe. But then he stops. He blinks at Tobias.

Oh no. No, no, not this again. All that time people judged Imelda, treating her like the bad guy when it wasn't her fault.

"Tobias, that's not fair. She has reasons. She- she's gotta do what's best--" But he cuts off. Tobias wants to go. He draws back.

"I... okay."

[hawkwardness]

Too late. He wasn't fast enough. He snaps out more words, helpless against the effects of the spell.

< The least she could do is tell you what those reasons are. Check on you once in a while. I'm not asking what her deal is, I don't need to know, but did she even tell you? Does it matter if I like her? >

[unpocoloco]

"Wh--"

He can't believe this. He can't believe this is happening again.

"Yes, she told me! Do you think we didn't talk before she had to go? She wouldn't do that to me! And it does matter! It matters to me! It matters that people apparently can't stop hating my wife because of my screw-ups! And worse, she liked you! She was kind to you! At least before when she banned music people just pinned it on that!"

So much for calm. So much for comfort. Now he's aching, frustrated, and upset.

[hawkwardness]

< I know, I liked her too. Both of you were the first people who ever cared about me. My fault too, even the doll knows it, I gave up and wouldn't let people try. But I don't hate her, I'm just angry at her. > He does't need to breathe to keep on talking. No pauses. Cruel unhelpful things keep broadcasting out of his head, even as he screams at himself to stop. < I don't understand why she left and there's so little time left, I thought she'd be back by now. I'd--I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I don't understand. >

And then it ends. He shrinks down, afraid and ashamed. < What... I didn't mean to say any of that. What did I... > Some fucking comfort indeed, Tobias. Stupid, weak little bird. There are no words to describe how much he hates himself in this moment for losing control--sheer black loathing, consuming him. And he still has no filter. < Sorry. What do I know about romance and family anyway? Don't listen to me. You... sometimes I think you'd have been better off never meeting me. >

[unpocoloco]

Is it better? He's not sure. Like Tobias said, he doesn't hate her but...

"Tobias. Imelda has to live without me. She had to live without me for years and years, not even knowing if I cared about her. She, more than anyone, knows the difference of who I was and who I am now. She..."

Tobias didn't mean to say it, but he felt it. And it all feels terrible. The beating up to follow doesn't help either. He sits back in the chair, brow knotting.

"... You know I didn't want to do this? Not to start with. It was ten years for us. Ten years without. I wanted to go home and take what I could get. And she... she didn't even know if she was ready for me back at all. Not because she hated me, but because this left a wound. We had to spend a long time grieving and not even getting to grieve properly. Trying to do this is terrifying. It's hoping something will work so bad and knowing that by putting that hope in... you risk bringing that grief back that much worse."

Because if they fail, after all this, then they wasted everything. The time, the energy, the last chance with each other. His shoulders sag.

"She wanted to forget me. It hurt so much. But she was the one who decided to get me started with this. I wouldn't know what I'm doing if she hadn't gotten me there. And not just that... for all that she wanted forget me, she didn't wish she'd never met me either. And I've never thought that about her, even when she really hurt me. So, why would I think that of you?"

He takes a slow, heavy breath.

"She can't put her life on hold for me, just like you can't. She has to live with herself no matter how this goes, and I need you to do that too. You lose people, it hurts, but you have to keep going. You hang on to the living and you remember how to live. Do you understand?"

[hawkwardness]

< Yes. Yes, I understand what you want me to do, but I can't. >

His voice is enough like sound to make it seem like he's whispering, pained. Wanting to cry. Impossible, for a hawk, and that's for the best. Tears would make things worse.

< Don't ask me to do that before you're gone. I can't. And you shouldn't have to be alone when... when it's time, missing her. That's what I don't understand. Why wouldn't she want to be there for you...? Did you ask her to leave? >

Please say no, he thinks. Please.

[unpocoloco]

"Why would I ask her to leave? I'm not selfless enough for that." He's not. He's really, really not. He keeps saying it over and over but maybe now he'll be believed.

He shakes his head, miserably.

"I don't know when the time is, neither of us knows. But, Tobias, if I can't talk to you about this before I'm gone, when can I? If this doesn't work, there is no after. I need you to promise me. Promise you will not make me an excuse to stop living. There are people here who care. If you need help, ask for it."

[hawkwardness]

< Okay. > he says, no louder than before. < I promise to try. >

No lying tonight, he can't promise he will. Maybe he'll fail. Maybe he can't be helped, maybe he's broken beyond repair. And the apocalypse won't wait for him to get his shit together.

< That's the best I can do. Try. >

[unpocoloco]

He slumps down where he is. The energy he barely had to start with goes out of him.

"Okay," He says. He runs a hand through his hair. "Okay."

He guesses that's the most he can ask for.

"I'm sorry."

[hawkwardness]

< This isn't your fault. >

He steps forward slowly. Cautiously? He's a hawk, he's hard to read. < None of this. Especially not... me. You didn't do anything wrong. >

[unpocoloco]

"The truth curse thingie's kind of my fault," He points out.

He probably should have left. Maybe it would have saved Tobias this trouble.

[hawkwardness]

< You tried a tricky spell to save your life and it didn't work out. > Weary with a hint of impatience. It makes him somewhat of a hypocrite and he doesn't even care. That may be the truth spell too, come to think of it. Emotional honesty. < You didn't do it on purpose, and you're the one having to hear awful things. Not me. >

[unpocoloco]

"You're feeling the awful things. And I can't say the right things to you because I can only say what I'm feeling."

He waves his hands.

"We're going back and forth. I don't know if sitting still here's really helping."

[hawkwardness]

< I don't want to hear things you don't mean, dude. >

Two hot, tired messes alone in a room. Yeah. Not doing them any good.

< ...Maybe we both need to accept we can't help each other. Not tonight. Do you want me to leave you alone a while? > It's Tobias. 'A while' could mean up to a few days.

[unpocoloco]

"I'm not saying that, I just mean not speaking my kneejerk reactions." Because those aren't more accurate either.

He scrubs his face.

"I just need to walk, I think. You don't need to avoid me. I'm not mad at you. I just..."

He's stressed and tired and doesn't know what to do.

cw vague torture ref

[hawkwardness]

< Just until this wears off. Or I miraculously learn to control myself. >

The night of the Hunt. The Galra ordeal. The morphing allergy. When will he be able to resist magical compulsions and... persuasion better? He flutters to the window. Open, of course, he doesn't like to leave them closed anymore.

< I'll see you tomorrow night. Hopefully. >

[unpocoloco]

"There's only so much you can or even should hold back. You're only human, Tobias," He sighs then. A beat passes, then a wry laugh. "Well. Sort of. You know what I mean."

Human underneath it all. A feathery body but still a boy in his head.

He lifts a hand, waving it.

"See you tomorrow night, mijo."

[hawkwardness]

Neither of them can stop talking. He digs talons into the windowsill, wanting to fly into the dark and to be with someone who will listen at the same time, because everything the man says makes him want to respond. And Héctor needs not to spend the night worrying about anyone but himself, doesn't he?

< I'll talk. I'll talk to someone else. Seems like I won't be able to stop myself tomorrow. > The pressure is building up inside again. It's almost like being sick--it comes in waves. < It doesn't have to be you all the time. I never wanted you to, I don't know, snap your fingers and fix me. I just wanted... I wished someone would love me. >

[unpocoloco]

His shoulders sag. This has been... a rough conversation. A rough meeting, for both of them. But that? That just about breaks his heart.

"Ay, mijo," He sighs then. "What made you think I didn't?"

[hawkwardness]

< Oh. >

Damn, damn, damn. He sinks down against the windowsill, covering his feet. < I wasn't thinking that. I meant... that's good. That's what I wanted. > A pause. < But it's nice to hear. No one's ever said it. >

[unpocoloco]

"It's not an easy thing to say, to a child who's not yous. Even when you want to. Even when they want you to. These are things you have t be careful with. Not just blurt them out."

He'd know. He was, after all, nobody's child.

"But you have to know you're worth something. Even if no one is telling you so."